Currently putting my daughter down for a nap and thinking of all the things I have to get done today and not wanting to do any of them. Let’s see it’s been a week for me and I’m expecting my second child. I’m constantly fighting my own energy because I’m so tired and want to do nothing. Unacceptable, because I have a very busy 2 year old. She’s allergic to milk, eggs, peanuts, shellfish and sensitive to wheat and soy. I ignore the sensitive part to wheat and soy because she has to eat it simply because she is already allergic to just about everything. So on many days in my mind I’m frustrated because I wish I could just go about feeding her all types of things but I can’t. So here’s a scenario I tend to always end up making two types of breakfasts, two types of lunch, and two types of dinner. That is majority of the time and lately I am exhausted of it. (Silently, hoping the second child is not allergic to a lot of things while praying the first grows out of these things). If I do have a day of one breakfast l, lunch, or dinner it is because I’m like “whatever, I’ll eat what she eats” or I’ll skip eating at certain times and I’ll eat later.
Then on the flip side of dealing with financial issues and dealing with the reality of wanting to work but can’t because I’m pregnant. Wanting to yell at employers because it was decided for me that I can’t work because I am pregnant when in reality I am capable. I can write, read, listen, take directions, give directions, understand, and LEAD. The only thing is you can see is my belly. Frustrated because I want to do things and accomplish things but money is an issue. Having to make sure my child is great but not feeling great on my own end. Feeling stressed but guilty because stress is not good because I’m carrying another life inside of me.
Current battle of dealing with people who are in the way, negative, or blinded. Constantly thinking of my own personal goals and working towards them daily and feeling like it’s taking forever. Dealing with mood swings and just wanting peace.
Making something out of nothing is a true thing when it comes to motherhood because sometimes you have nothing but you make it happen. On the list of today feeding, laundry, cleaning, appt, food shopping and activities. Did I mention I don’t want to do any of that? Somewhere in there I have to figure out where I can fit things in for myself but usually by then the day is over 😪. Oh and due for major need of a girls night out. No a couple of girls nightssss out.